Why are you walking around on eggshells so much?

If you often find yourself walking on eggshells around your partner because you’re so used to the smallest comment spiraling into a full blown conflict…

…then one solution for you is to get really clear on what your unmet needs are.

Because the actual substance of the fight is almost always never the real issue.

(Last time I had a fight with my husband it was about lentils being put to boil. Let me tell you, it was NOT about the lentils)

What was it about?

I was feeling burned out and tired, and my need for safety, trust, and feeling held was far from met. 

Most conflict - especially that chronic, easy-to-trigger kind - 

Is built on a hotbed of unmet emotional needs, unprocessed pain, and stories you don’t even realize you’re still carrying.

And it’s those unmet needs that are really the driving force behind all the tension, the defensiveness, the criticism. 

Now, emotional needs often go unspoken for months (or even years).

And when those needs aren’t met - whether it’s to feel heard, supported, appreciated, desired - they don’t just disappear.

They build up. Quietly.

Until something small - like a forgotten text, a dismissive tone, or being late - triggers everything.

And suddenly, you’re in the same fight again.

Not because of the moment…

But because of the meaning underneath it.

"You don’t listen to me." (the need to feel heard)
"I don’t feel important to you." (the need to feel important)

"I’m tired of carrying this alone." (the need to feel supported)

The fight becomes the outlet for a need that’s been ignored for too long.

And because neither person fully understands what they’re really craving…
The argument goes in circles.

And get this sick irony…often the conflict itself becomes a form of connection.

Because guess what, when you’re in the middle of yelling at each other or stuck overthinking the past few hours of tension, you’re actually connecting.

You’re engaging.

You’re yelling and feeling seen and powerful and heard.

In a sick and maladaptive way, sure.

But you are connecting! You’re being seen!

Soooo quite logically, getting real clarity on what your needs are and finding effective ways to get them met would be useful, right?

Which you can do. 

The trick here is to look at your REAL needs, the deeper ones beneath the superficial - and most people don’t know what these are, because they’ve never really gone there. 

This isn’t something you can Google in 10 minutes or “figure out” on a walk.

It requires a more deliberate approach, and more reflection, as well as potentially clearing any blocks to seeing your needs (which is common). 

Good news is, I can help you with this! 

If you're ready to stop spiraling into the same conflicts, and finally feel confident in your needs (and how to get them met)...

I have a science-backed and structured way to help you :) 

As well as tons of conflict resolution tools, to help you ease things quickly too.

Just email me to learn more.