Blog Posts
How can I end the feeling of uncertainty and indecision in my relationship?
One of the hardest things we can experience in a relationship is the feeling of uncertainty and indecision. When we feel stuck in a state of limbo, unable to move forward and relax into the relationship, or unable to exit and start our life anew, we can feel trapped.
It can feel exhausting, in fact.
“I don’t have time to look at my relationship” - Why the myth of ‘not having enough time’ is a dangerous one.
If you’re anything like most people you have focused on your professional life - and your love life has always been a bit confusing and vague.
A mythic, romantic, enigma.
You’ve tried to understand it.
You’ve done some therapy or counseling, read blogs, listened to podcasts, and whatever other things you’ve done to try to heal your relationships.
It can feel chaotic and stressful to be honest.
A bit all over the place.
4 signs you’re potentially self-sabotaging your relationship…and would benefit from doing some inner work
This is an unconscious pattern of self abandonment that stems from fearing abandonment and therefore, being addicted, unconsciously, to that very same pattern. This NEEDS to change if you want to see the truth of your relationship. Because when you transform this pattern, you step up into your potential to ask for what you want and need, for what you deserve, and actually communicate that effectively…so that they can hear it. You also create healthy boundaries that mean you stop tolerating bad behavior which increases the chances of them giving you good behavior.
5 reasons why you aren’t attracting (or already in) a healthy, meaningful, fulfilling relationship
Whether you’re single and have been struggling for years to find the right match for you, or you’re in a long term relationship (or marriage) but are feeling unfulfilled in it…it may be that you are blocking yourself unconsciously from having exactly what you want.
This isn’t to say you’re doing it consciously or that it’s somehow your fault - we all have blockers and blind spots that we aren’t aware of, and that we gained as children (without realizing it or choosing it).
So if you ARE blocking yourself, rest assured you’re not alone, and it’s not your fault. Not at all.
3 Reasons why your relationship isn’t working for you
Being in relationship limbo and not knowing whether to stay or go is one of the hardest, and most debilitating places to be.
Going slightly crazy, your mind constantly going back and forth, deliberating over what to do, what’s wrong with you, what’s wrong with the relationship, what’s wrong with them.
Googling for answers, trawling through internet forums trying to see if other people have felt this way. Talking to friends, watching reality TV shows about love and trying to see if other people have been through similar dilemmas.
Why do I keep attracting the same type of person in my romantic relationships?
These patterns that you keep seeing - the pattern of emotional unavailability, drama, stress, anxiety, feeling like you’re low priority for someone, feeling like you’re stuck in limbo, feeling like you’re on a rollercoaster of receiving hot and cold love from someone…
Where you’re constantly feeling anxious, you find yourself ruminating, thinking a lot, worrying, debating what to do, debating what to say, going back and forth…
Where you find yourself second-guessing yourself, doubting yourself, and wondering what’s the ‘right’ thing to do…
I’ve tried tons of things to help me improve my personal life, my relationships. Why is nothing working?
I had this too.
I spent WELL over $40k in the past decade, and way more than that in the past 15 years looking for answers. I was lucky that I grew up in a personal development household where investing into these things was seen as a healthy thing to do…but honestly, I was almost a little bit addicted. Always looking for that next fix…
…and yet, nothing really DID fix me, not fully.
Why do I keep attracting the same type of person in my romantic relationships?
I hear it all the time from clients:
“I keep attracting emotionally unavailable women. They show interest in me initially and pursue me, but as soon as we get close or a real relationship starts to form, they start to lose interest and things fizzle out”.
“I keep attracting women who shut down when the going gets tough, and either they walk away, avoid hard conversations, get defensive, or throw it back in my face”.
“I keep attracting men who give me just breadcrumbs of affection and don’t give me what I really want and need…but I can’t seem to stop being attracted to them”.
“I keep attracting men who pursue me at the beginning and are super romantic, giving me flowers, taking me on dates, and doing everything that I want, but then I find out that they’re actually in a relationship with someone else - or they just disappear”.
These patterns that you keep seeing - the pattern of emotional unavailability, drama, stress, anxiety, feeling like you’re low priority for someone, feeling like you’re stuck in limbo, feeling like you’re on a rollercoaster of receiving hot and cold love from someone…
Where you’re constantly feeling anxious, you find yourself ruminating, thinking a lot, worrying, debating what to do, debating what to say, going back and forth…
Where you find yourself second-guessing yourself, doubting yourself, and wondering what’s the ‘right’ thing to do…
How do I know what to do? Listening to the voice within
It’s one thing to discern what’s coming up for us and another entirely to know what the message is. How often have we felt an instinct, gut response, or some sort of inner awareness coming from within but been utterly unsure as to what it’s trying to tell us?
Can I trust my gut instinct about my relationship? Why discernment is important
I will never forget going to my coach, feeling unsure and unclear about what to do about my first engagement. Everything on the surface looked right, but inside I felt tremendous anxiety – and I couldn't shake out exactly why. We had the picture perfect relationship and everyone seemed to envy the life we lived, so why did I lie awake at night wondering, "Is this really it?"